Plans had been finalized, big sister/big brother shirts were packed and we were headed to tell the kids of our big news… They were getting a new sibling!
I had so many mixed emotions …
Would they be excited?
Would they feel jealous?
If they were excited, would their mom try to take that away from them?
I was so anxious to get there and spill the beans!
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How should you tell your stepkids about your “Ours Baby”?
We had planned a surprise getaway to Great Wolf Lodge, and told the kids we were leaving tomorrow! As we started packing clothes for the trip, we handed them each a shirt that they could bring along… Her’s had a picture of an owl and the words “Whoooo’s going to be a sister to twoooo” and he had a picture of a fox with the words “Being promoted to big brother!”.
They took a look and after a brief moment of confusion, they got it.
Their reception was what I had hoped for, they were thrilled. Placed bets on girl or boy, talked about who the baby would look like, and the weight was lifted. We were happily blending!
We proceeded with our night and all I had left weighing on my mind was dropping the bomb on bio mom… that was a reaction I wasn’t expecting to be so positive.
Time to tell bio mom that our blended family was expanding…
We finished our night with the kids, got them to bed, and started discussing how to deliver the news.
It made the most sense to have it come from me, we had become text-friendly and she may be less inclined to come back with negativity. So I did, I sent a picture of the kids in their shirts and told her how excited they were about getting another sibling. We sat and held our breath as we saw those three little dots… She sent “congrats” with confetti. It was all I could’ve hoped for, drama-free.
Our getaway everything I had wanted it to be. My stepson believed he had transformed into a wolf and he would spend the next couple of years fantasizing about his adventures with his wolf pack.
My stepdaughter loved accomplishing the tasks required and would insert little questions about the baby throughout our stay. I was so happy they had such a positive experience to associate with the big news and we will all have such fond memories of that time.
The initial response was all I could’ve asked for from both the kids and bio mom, for that I am thankful.
I truly feel that telling the kids before bio mom was the best thing we could’ve done, especially being that we had a few days with them to answer questions and let it sit with them before they went back to her.
I highly recommend telling bio mom before she hears it from the kids, and at a time that she will also be able to digest before she’s faced with them. I imagine even women who take the high road by default would have some feelings about their kids having a sibling they don’t even know…
We were so afraid that the reaction would be hurtful, and we wanted to try our best to shield them from that in any way we could.
How did you tell your stepkids? Biomom?
How was it received?
Share your experience in the comments below!